Uninhibited

Last weekend was Spring Concert, and I had a fabulous time.

Though the music was a little disappointing, the company was good, and I danced in a way that I haven't in a while--completely uninhibited. Due to a mix of the buzz and my hyper mood, I danced and danced and danced like nobody was watching. I danced in every which way, form, and style I wanted. I just danced in the feeling of the moment. And it was great. It was exactly what I needed.

This weekend, I went out not intending to go out. I had a lot of work to do, so I wasn't drinking. I didn't want to stay out late and be tired the next day, but somehow, I ended up bouncing from the Rhythm and Shoes show to Marsh Coffehaus to Plimpton Prom.

Lilly Allen's "Hard Out Here" was playing as we walked in, and I knew:
I wasn't drinking. But I was definitely dancing.

I wondered if I just let it go, just danced the way I felt like dancing--no matter how outrageous or mellow--if I could attain that level of uninhibitedness, the fun, the release that I had felt the weekend before. I gave it a try. I was aware that people were watching but in my mind I looked fabulous, and so I danced and danced and danced like nobody was watching. And, again, it was great.

Disclaimer:  People will think you're drunk. Even if you explain to them that you're completely sober. Even if you do yoga poses in the middle of the dance floor. They will not believe you and will go ahead thinking you're drunk.

。。。

That bout of total release is something I feel has been missing from my life recently. It's a feeling I believe a lot of people forget--the feeling of giving up all cares and letting yourself be yourself--but it's an important feeling to keep with you. I can't quite articulate why, but for me, even the remembrance of it spreads an ease and contentedness throughout me. It was kind of a moment of pure bliss. I wasn't worried about what people were thinking. I wasn't worried about my school work. I wasn't worried about the future. I simply enjoyed the music and the company of my friends and let everything else go.

Maybe it's important to keep memories like this in reserve so that you know you can always reach down and pull those feelings back out again, so that you always remember that feelings like these are possible.

。。。

Side story:  When we returned to the dorm, we found that some people had set up a "laser" maze in the common room (strands of yarn going every which way that you had to avoid touching lest you get "burned"). Raichu and I crawled, climbed, and wriggled our way through the maze. It was a fun end to a fun night.